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Parenting Survival Checklists

Keeping Tiny Humans Alive Since... Today? Yesterday? What day is it?

Is your child still alive? Did they eat something today? Are they actually sick or just avoiding school? These checklists won't make you parent of the year, but at least you'll laugh through the chaos. 😵‍💫

🚀 Launching Soon!

These hilarious parenting checklists are being uploaded to Gumroad as we speak. Check back in 24 hours or join the newsletter to get notified when they're live!

📅 Expected: Within 24 hours
💰 Price: $2.99 each (bundles available!)

🎁 Bundle Deals (Coming Soon)

FULL CHAOS!

The Complete Parenting Survival Kit

All 10 checklists for parents who have no idea what they're doing (it's all of us).

$17.99 $29.90

💰 Save $12!

Includes All 10 Checklists:

  • Is My Child Still Alive?
  • Is My Child an Alien?
  • What Did My Teenager Actually Eat?
  • Are They Sick or Just Faking It?
  • Is Their Room a Biohazard?
  • Did My Child Leave Their Room Today?
  • Is My Child a Vampire?
  • Am I an Embarrassing Parent?
  • Screen Time vs. Real Life
  • + 1 Bonus Surprise!
🚀 Available in 24 hours

Parenting Starter Pack

The 4 essentials for new parents or anyone just trying to survive.

$8.99 $11.96

💰 Save $3!

Includes 4 Must-Haves:

  • Is My Child Still Alive?
  • Are They Sick or Faking It?
  • Screen Time vs. Real Life
  • Did My Child Leave Their Room?
🚀 Available in 24 hours

📋 Individual Checklists (Preview)

Each one is $2.99. Launching soon!

👶 Is My Child Still Alive?

Daily survival checklist: breathing? eating? hasn't escaped? You're winning at parenting.

$2.99 Soon!

👽 Is My Child an Alien?

Weird behavior tracker. Speaks in memes? Only eats beige food? Definitely an alien.

$2.99 Soon!

🍕 What Did My Teenager Actually Eat Today?

Food intake tracker. Spoiler: It's chips, pizza, and existential dread.

$2.99 Soon!

🤒 Are They Sick or Just Faking It?

The scientific method for detecting BS. Symptoms disappear when you mention school.

$2.99 Soon!

☣️ Is My Child's Room a Biohazard?

Room inspection checklist. Unidentified smells? Mystery stains? Call hazmat.

$2.99 Soon!

🚪 Did My Child Leave Their Room Today?

Daily room exit tracker. Bathroom doesn't count. Kitchen raids don't count either.

$2.99 Soon!

🧛 Is My Child a Vampire?

Sleep schedule analyzer. Awake at 3am? Avoids sunlight? Vampire confirmed.

$2.99 Soon!

😳 Am I an Embarrassing Parent?

Self-assessment quiz. Spoiler: Yes. But embrace it. They'll survive.

$2.99 Soon!

📱 Screen Time vs. Real Life Balance Check

Digital detox tracker. If their iPad has a better relationship with them than you do...

$2.99 Soon!

Why Parents Will Love These

😂

Brutally Honest

No toxic positivity here. Just real parenting chaos.

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Painfully Relatable

You'll feel seen. And judged. Mostly seen.

🎁

Perfect Gifts

For new parents, exhausted parents, or basically all parents.

Get Notified When They Launch! 🚀

Be the first to get these parenting survival checklists (and save with launch pricing).

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Join hundreds of parents who have no idea what they're doing either.

🚀 Launching in 24 hours! Sign up above to get notified.